Rate this poem; My Dad is Amazing by Ian Souter

I think it's a brilliant play with language.

My dad is amazing for can walk around with his head in the clouds.
Photo source: 212 media studios

My dad is AMAZING for he can:

Make mountains out of molehills

teach Granny to suck eggs

make mum's blood boil

and then drive her up the wall.

My dad is Amazing for he also

walk around with his head in the clouds

has my sister eating out of his hands

says he's got eyes in the back of his head

can read me like a book

But the most Amazing thing of all is

When he's caught someone red-handed

first he jumps down their throat

and then bites their head off!

Angry British man who threatened to bomb an independent Scotland ordered by court to pay £500 fine

Edinburgh city sheriff court ordered 43-year old Ian Thirlaway to pay the sum of £500 as fine after he pled guilty to committing a racially aggravated breach of the peace. Thirlaway who is a British oil worker flew into a fit of rage after he missed his train at the Edinburgh Waverley station. He began shouting and swearing at the staff in the train station before saying, " I hope you get independence and we have spare bombs and we can bomb the whole place". He was arrested by the British Transport Police and he continued in rage saying to the officers " I'm arrested and you let... and immigrants in here, F***ing hell. His defence lawyer told the court her client made those statements because he suffered from severe depression and when under pressure he attacked anyone and everyone.

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This is the human barbie who has had no help achieving "The Look"

16-year old Lolita Richi is from Kiev in Ukraine and she boasts her Barbie look is all natural . She claims she is the best Human Barbie yet and hasn't had help from cosmetic surgery, dieting or even Photoshop. Lolita who is still in high school says all the boys fancy her and she is the queen bee among the girls. She goes on to say her looks are all natural although she does use push up bras to enhance her breast, she doesn't do anything special as she is blessed with a gorgeous figure. People have openly told her they are jealous of her figure and looks and would want to look like her.

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